 Authors ♥ Luffs Male 08 February 1984 Photography Enthusiast ♥ Lingz Female 27 October 1984 His Creative Assistant   Wishlist MOST WANTED! Lose weight Travel Japan - Hokkaido China - 九寨沟 Thailand - Chiang Mai Vietnam - Ho Chi Minh City Iceland Nepal Household Items Microwave Oven Study Chairs Camera / Camera Accessories AF-S Nikkor 14-24mm f/2.8G ED Gitzo Tripod & Ball Head Gadgets Cravings Dim Sum @ Swee Choon Tim Sum Steak / Chicken @ Hog's Breath Cafe Russian Cuisine @ Shashlik Restaurant Australian Food @ Mad Jack Cafe Breakfast @ Riders Cafe Seen & Heard 2009 Ip Man Ong Bak 2 The Pink Panther 2 Slumdog Millionaire Shinjuku Incident Fast & Furious 4 Angels & Demons Ice Age 3 UP Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2012 Paranormal Activity 2010 Sherlock Holmes Hachiko: A Dog's Story Dear John Ip Man 2 The Karate Kid SALT 2011 Kungfu Panda 2 Horrible Bosses Johnny English Sherlock Holmes : A Game Of Shadows 2012 The Amazing Spiderman Holidays Australia : Perth 14 - 22 March 2009 Taiwan : Taipei & Taichung 14 - 22 September 2009 Europe : Amsterdam, Paris, Switzerland, Italy & Greece 30 April - 20 May 2011 Cambodia : Siem Reap 07 - 13 December 2011 Japan : Tokyo, Hakone, Kyoto, Hiroshima & Osaka 26 March - 08 April 2012 Conversation Memories My Redeemer Lives! Cooking Eggs! Life Is Short Back From Koala Land I'm Leaving On A Jet Plane IT Show 2009 Incomplete Mixed Feelings About Perth Singapore = Too Expensive ? IT Fairs In 2009 History January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 October 2011 November 2011 April 2012 July 2012 Friends Flickr (kelvin_luffs) Anne Hwa Seng Jane Jason & Jia Qin Joanne Jocelin Juan Zee Kenix Maggie Jie Pie Ling Qiu Xian Rina Sam Shirley Shu Hui Yvonne Home Trends Apartment Therapy Design Ideas For Your House Home Rejuvenation Latest Trends In Home Appliances Simple Human Blogshops All Things Lovely Almost Famous Ascentee Dressabelle Green Poppies Hollyhoque Intoxiquett Kvetiny Le Flirtini Lily Pirates Loef Love Bonito Megagamie My Glamour Place Ohvola Omocha Land Pearlavish Room 290 Swivelle The Tinsel Rack The Velvet Dolls Thread Theory Others 
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Friday, March 27, 2009 @ 9:30 AM
Did I Marry The Right Person? Not that I am thinking if I married the right person (because I know I did!), but Ah Pie sent this to me and I felt that it is a very good article to share. Those who are still single may learn something from here... Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage and relationship... --------------------------------------- DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON? During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind. Here's the answer. EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse / partner. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior / habit). Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love... Because it's happening TO YOU. People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU. Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later… Because (listen carefully to this): THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND. SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the expression "the labor of love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable... You can "make" love. Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling. Remember this always: "God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go."  Together, we make it happen. Be effective, get results. Do what is right. Work together. |